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twilightmobius in morningkuri

Why do we love idols?

I was watching the live of Dekkai Uchuu ni Ai ga Aru from the Hello Pro Matsuri thing this summer just now, and I realized halfway through that I was crying. I had no real explanation as to WHY I was crying--it seemed absolutely insane to me, seeing that I'm (A) not a huge cryer when it comes to this kind of stuff, and (B) it's just a concert perf. I couldn't figure out why--and then, it hit me.


I'm deeply and totally attached to Hello! Project.

I'm not sure why this only hit me just now, but it did. I've always been a fan, since I was sucked into the H!P void only about half a year ago. But it struck me today, at 3:33 AM, that I was truly and deeply attached to the girls.

You see, since I got into H!P, I found a sort of solace in watching the girls of Morning Musume, Berryz Koubou, C-ute, Melon Kinenbi, and so on and so forth. And I've come to see the girls as role models, and... idols.

Fujimoto Miki has been my inspiration for standing up to the establishment--for her seemingly strong "I have a boyfriend UFA, whatcha gonna do about it?" attitude. Goto Maki has become my idol for her ability to blend her styles and grow and mature musically and in every other way. Yoshizawa Hitomi is my girl-crush--she does boyish, she does girly, she does everything with a Yossie-style that makes me squee.

I model my behavior on them--that cute face I saw Chinami make in Gag 100kaibun Aishite Kudasai, I use when I flirt with guys. That Takitty "I own you" look from Onna ni Sachi Are is a great way to get people to believe you're more confident than you really feel. Satoda Mai and Konno Asami's expressions in Narihajimeta Koi no Bell are emulated in my real life, during speech or even just because I feel like making a face.

When they sing a song, it feels like they're singing it for me, describing some strange part of my life--Ajisai AI Ai Monogatari and Kokuhaku no Funsui Hiroba might as well be two pieces to the puzzle of my love life; Unforgettable reminds me almost instantaneously of my best friend's Sweet 16 and how crazy-good it was (or Crazy Happy, depending on how you want to look at it); Kanashimi Twilight is my definitive view on romance, boys, and what exactly I keep doing wrong. Hell, Massara Blue Jeans is really how I feel when I get a new pair of jeans, and Glass no Pumps has become the one song I can sing that makes me feel... sexy. (Strangely, not SOME BOYS, but that may be because I associate SOME BOYS with SOME BOYS! Blog)

How can I not love it? How can I not think about it and go, "I love Hello! Project"?

The thing is, we love idols because... they make us feel GOOD. They're not real, and we don't really know the REAL girls, but we feel like we know them, like they're our old friends. When Hello! Project sang Dekkai Uchuu ni Ai ga Aru, I felt like they were reminding me that love exists in this crazy world, like they were my best friends, looking me straight in the eye, and saying with a smile, "Ne, ganbatte Kuri-chan~ ♥" And for someone who had a such a craptacular week, it made me think, "Well... Maybe next week will be better." It's a powerful sort of thing...

But it's really a great feeling, don't you think?

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